02:いってきます「ittekimasu」

‘I’ll be going, then…’

Never once in all his days did Edward Elric expect to be treated like anyone’s little brother.  Nor did he have any particular desire to be considered as such…  After all, he was the big brother [though physical stature would beg to differ] and he would be damned if he was to ever be regarded otherwise.  Needless to say, when he joined Roy Mustang’s party, as it were, the relationships he formed with his fellow subordinates thereafter left him a little perplexed.

There was Second Lieutenant Jean Havoc…who had always treated Edward pretty much as an equal peer.  But Havoc was rather a young buck himself, so Edward hadn’t been too surprised by that.  Major Armstrong was just about as weird as they got, and while Edward had to confess he was fond of the big man, there were times he was more than unnerved by the major’s paternal fawning tendencies.  Maes Hughes, rest his soul, was actually the closest thing to a father the Elric boys might have ever experienced…and Edward did miss the bespectacled man so.  First Lieutenant Hawkeye seemed to view everyone with the gaze of a protective elder sister, so somehow the fact that she treated the boys like younger siblings had never bothered Edward (he had actually grown to like Hawkeye once he had gotten past her aloof and somewhat intimidating exterior…).

But the colonel was a completely different story.  In Edward’s mind there was nothing more irritating and vexing that Roy Mustang’s condescending eyes peering down at him from that position of authority he just seemed to relish in holding over the boy’s head.  Everything about the colonel got under Edward’s skin.  His smug smile, his silver tongue, his imperturbable attitude and his unflappable calm…  But most of all…more than anything else, Edward Elric despised the way Roy treated him like a kid.  The way he teased him, tested him, and picked on him so mercilessly drove the boy to a point of such fluster he couldn’t even think straight.

Hawkeye had lightly defended the colonel’s motives once, when she had bumped into a particularly piqued Edward in the hallway.  She had explained to the lad that Roy had been the youngest of four, and had only sisters growing up; he had never been given the opportunity to play the part of the big brother before, and Edward had bristled at the insinuation.

‘Big brother, my ass,’ Edward had fumed.

Roy Mustang did not know the first thing about how to act like a big brother according to the Elric Book of Being a Big Brother.

Big brothers gave advice, not lectures.  …Though, Edward did have to admit Roy made a good point once in a while.

Big brothers looked out for their juniors; they didn’t put them in troubling situations.  …Though Edward did acknowledge that Roy had never actually put him or Al in any danger on purpose.

Big brothers protected people…guided them and nurtured their talents—they certainly didn’t pick on them and make fun of their shortcomings.  And while Edward confessed that it had been the colonel who had pressed him to honing his alchemical skills and becoming a State Alchemist…and while he would begrudgingly admit that he did trust that the colonel had his back if things ever got tough…he had absolutely nothing to justify or counterbalance the latter point in the complaint.

He had sourly grumbled these grievances to Hawkeye as she stood with him in the hallway listening patiently like a good big sister should…and then she had just given him that peculiar Mona Lisa smile she wore from time to time before shaking her head hopelessly and continuing down the hall, leaving Edward to further disgruntled ponderings on his own.

With no one to gripe to, Edward had huffed and pouted for a little while.

Big brother indeed, bah! he had thought to himself.  As if he would ever view Mustang in a fraternal light.  How preposterous!

But as most people are expected to at some point in their life, even the Fullmetal Alchemist contemplated eating those very words.  There came a day when even the supreme intellect of Edward Elric was at a loss for explanation of the unusual emotion that came over him as a result of the events that had taken place.  And it seemed that even an Elric—while surely the wisest of all small blond creatures—could be persuaded to reevaluate his viewpoint.

It had been a cool autumn afternoon, and Edward was seated in Mustang’s office, where he often found himself, giving a report on the week’s happenings.  Before the boy had gotten very far in the discussion with his superior, the phone on Roy’s desk had rung loudly, startling the both of them a tad more than they were willing to own up to.  After a series of curt, monosyllabic responses into the phone receiver, the colonel’s face tightened into a grim mask that Edward could only suppose meant whatever the news was…it wasn’t good.

“I was supposed to oversee some new procedures for this year’s upcoming State Alchemist Examination later today,” he explained upon meeting Edward’s questioning gaze.  He folded his hands together on top of the desk.  “But it seems there has been an accident.”

“Accident?”  Edward hadn’t liked the sound of that at all.

Roy had nodded somberly, his dark eyes narrow.

“Some of the candidates for this year’s test thought it would be clever to try and renovate the test site to try and get in better favor with the panel,” he continued.  “The satellite testing facility is rather old and is in need of some restoration, but these upstarts had no clue what they were doing.”  He closed his eyes briefly.  “The building collapsed.”

Edward was appalled, and looked the part.

Roy rose and rolled his shoulders.

“Where are you going?” Edward had inquired.  “I was still giving my report!”

How rude of the colonel to just get up and leave!

“The report can wait, Fullmetal,” Roy had replied slowly, retrieving his jacket from behind the office door.  “I’m going out to help with the clean-up and rescue.”

“Rescue?”  Edward felt rather like an echo.

“The parties responsible are still trapped in the rubble.”

“I’ll go with you,” Edward had piped up quickly before he really gave thought to what he was saying.  Roy held up one arm and shook his head firmly.

“No, you won’t,” he countered strictly, and Edward’s face contorted angrily at the refusal.

“Why the hell not?” he demanded, leaping to his feet.

“Because it’s dangerous.”

“Dangerous, bah!” the blond pressed on.  “You never seemed to have any qualms about sending Al and I off on dangerous missions before…”

Roy’s black eyes were cheerless.

“Those were situations I was familiar with,” he clarified.  “They were still within a circle of my control.  I knew what to expect, and I knew you could handle things.”  He squinted.  “This, however, I am not familiar with, nor do I know what to expect.  This is an alchemically and structurally unsound ruin of a structure, and if you get crushed rushing into things the way you always do, then I’ll have no one to pick on, and that just won’t do.”  He checked to make sure his alchemy gloves were in the pocket of his coat, then pointed at Edward.  “You’re staying here, Fullmetal, and that’s final.”

“But—“

“I’ll be back before dark.  Spice up that report of yours, I expect you to finish recounting it immediately upon my return, so make sure it’s interesting.”

“Taisa--!”

“No, Edward,” Roy interjected firmly, raising his voice only a hair, but enough to stop Edward’s rant from being voiced.  It was spooky the way the colonel could do that.  Even Edward was stunned into silence when Roy Mustang raised his voice…because Roy Mustang never raised his voice.  The older man pointed sharply at his desk.  “You’re in charge of my office until I get back, so none of your shenanigans.  If I come back and you’ve made a mess of things I’ll be irritated.”

And he turned to head out the door into the hallway.

Edward had started to argue back again, having recovered from Roy’s reprimand, and then hesitated, the words stuck on his tongue.  Why was it…that this sounded so very familiar to him…?  As if he had had this conversation somewhere before…?

“Nii-san, let me help!”

“No, Al, you wait here and take care of Winry.  I’ll get the kite down out of the tree.”

“But Nii-san, I’m a better climber than you are.  My arms are longer!”

“WHO ARE YOU SAYING IS SO SHORT HE COULDN’T CLIMB STAIRS!?”

“I didn’t say that much…”

“Al, just take care of Winry.  The kite’s caught on a high branch with thin limbs all around it.  I don’t want you to go.”

“But why??”

“Because if you fall and bust your head open I won’t have a little brother anymore.”

Edward rolled the memory around on his brain for a bit.  He and Winry had been six years old.  Al had been five.  Winry had fashioned up a fantastic kite-frame, and the boys had cut up an old blueprint Granny Pinako hadn’t needed anymore to stretch across the bones of the frame.  The kite had flown like a champ…until it had been caught in a sudden updraft, yanked askew, and deposited neatly in the top of the old peach tree in the Rockbell’s backyard. 

Winry had been upset to the point of tears that her kite was ruined. 

But Al had been angry.  He had thought Ed wouldn’t let him climb the tree because he was being mean and pulling rank as the elder sibling.  But the truth was that tree was an accident waiting to happen.  It was older than Pinako (and she must have been 300 years old back then!) and full of dry-rot and termites.  And if Al fell, Ed would have been beside himself.  That was why he had refused.

Could it…could it be that…Mustang was…?

Edward shook his head quickly, evicting any such thoughts from his skull.  No.  No way.  He was just doing this so he had one more thing to hold over Edward’s head…

“Nii-san, that’s not fair!  I want to help!”

“Al—“

“You’re so mean!  Don’t you have any faith in me?”

Edward scowled.  There was no freaking way he was going to compare Mustang’s intentions to his own.

“Al, no more arguing.  You’re in charge of Winry.  Tell her not to cry, I’ll rescue her dear kite.”

“But—“

“When I get back, she’d better not be crying or I’ll be upset with you…”

It was similar.  It was way too similar.

He blinked slowly, watching Roy adjust the collar of his coat and reach for the door. 

He thought for a moment…back to that summer afternoon when he had scaled the peach tree after forbidding Al to follow.  He recalled how he had climbed all the way up to the top of the tree to retrieve the kite, dropped it safely down to the ground, and started to climb back to earth…  He remembered the sickening lurch and gut-wrenching crrakk! beneath him…the feeling of weightlessness as the branches gave way and plunged him back to the earth that seemed so very far away…

He had fallen hard, but gotten away with naught but a broken wrist.

Al had scolded him terribly, and Winry had practically thrown a fit.  But all that had really mattered to Edward was that it had been him and not Al…

And for some reason…Roy Mustang seemed to have a similar intention with his current and adamant refusal of Edward’s company…

…which was not only annoying to Edward, but somehow scarier than hell…

…Wait…  Edward realized with some level of disconcertion that if everything else about this situation was so uncannily similar to that day beneath the peach tree…then did that mean…?

He glanced down at his left wrist, wincing at a phantom pain from many years ago, and then lifted his eyes to the colonel.

“Taisa!” he called, and Roy paused in the doorway to give him an irked frown and a roll of his coal-black eyes.

“For the last time, Fullmetal,” he grumbled, “no, you cannot come with me, so would you kindly—“

“Be careful.”

Roy balked.  What?  What had he just said?  If Roy’s ears weren’t deceiving him quite cruelly, Edward Elric had just told him to take care and be safe?  Gods, was the boy ill?

He stood there in the doorway a moment, his mouth only slightly agape as he searched the youth’s eyes for signs of sarcasm.  He was startled to find none.

Hm.  Fancy that.  Wonders truly never did cease. 

Roy smiled faintly and nodded.

“I’ll be going, then…”

okay, so...for those of you left with aforementioned feelings of wtf at the end there...let me give small explanation.  the theme for this, いってきます, doesn't exactly have an english translation.  in japan, this is something you would say when you left the house.  so it's sort of like saying, 'i'll be off now!' as you go.  the response that whoever you might be leaving in the house would give the response, 'いっ てらっしゃい'! [itterasshai] which, again, doesn't really have a translation, but can be literally translated to 'go and return'.  so, more or less, it connotes you're wishing your departing friend well as they go.  my favorite take on a translation for this phrase is, 'be safe', which was used in the official licensed translation of Fruits Basket.  for those of you who have seen furuba, you should kind of get what i was going for here...  for those of you who haven't [or those of you who forgot?], hilight the text below (it's white to prevent spoilers) for an explanation of what i was going for here...

{the main female protagonist of furuba is honda tohru.  poor dear tohruchyan lost her mother in a car accident, and in the...second or third episode she divulges to shigure that she feels terribly guilty for her mother's death, because on the day of her mother's death, she did not say 'be safe' [itterasshai] when her mother left.  she had been up late studying the night before and did not wake up in time to wish her mother well before she left the house.}

it seems to be my understanding that this is a relatively common superstition that it is bad luck to not say itterasshai to someone when they leave; it's like if you don't say, 'be safe!' when someone leaves the house...they might not come back...well...safe.  this is what i was going for.  hope the reference wasn't too vague.  thoughts?  ^_^;;